Day Two

So that vegetable soup so did not happen. However, I still kept it light enough. I ate another peanut butter & jelly sandwich because I only recently rediscovered how easy and delicious they really are (and saves me some money too). I also enjoyed a cup of coffee with my boyfriend made with our new Farberware Percolator from Bed Bath & Beyond. (Model # FCP412 in case you want to check it out. ) It tastes MUCH better made with one of these nifty things. I also had some tasty fresh strawberries which satisfied my sweet tooth.

Of course, I was totally yearning for some other wonderful snacks. And by snacks, I mean a heaping plate of penne a la vodka. Yes, as a true foodaholic I have come to consider 10oz. of pasta enveloped in a rich, delightful, cheesy tomato cream sauce as a mere “snack”. But I resisted! I fought temptation!

Oh and did I mention that I took a four hour nap. Seriously, a four hour nap. Anytime I get hungry I try to sleep. Can't think of much else to do.

In case you haven’t realized, I am not only trying to curb my eating habits but I would also like to lose some weight as well. My weight has been up and down so many times that it’s like I am a different person each month. About 9 months ago I lost 30 pounds and was feeling great! But I’ve gained at least 15 pounds back and feel like a whale. I don’t think I’m THAT fat, but hey, WiiFit did call me OBESE! WiiFit you bastard.

So let’s see, besides that peanut butter & jelly sandwich, I ate a cheese sandwich on a whole wheat roll and half a cup of corn (I really love corn). My plans are to fry up some vegetables for later and try those strawberries again.

Let’s go willpower!

Day 1

Today I began my venture into changing my life and eating habits.  I know it's going to be hard and will possibly even be impossible, but hey, I gotta try.

I was so hungry this morning that I convinced myself I was truly starving.  I ate light last night so I didn't go to bed as full and busting like I usually do.  When I woke up my stomach was growling like a vicious animal.  Oh how I am depriving myself!  I think I feel faint.  I think my body may be failing due to lack of nourishment! I think...that I'm pathetic.  I quickly scarf down a delicious peanut butter and jelly sandwich made on whole wheat (whole wheat!) bread with a deep fervor as if the world is coming to an end and this peanut butter and jelly sandwich is my only hope.  Ooh, much better.  I go online to check email and apply for more jobs.  I'm excited to find that on one of the sites that I post this on, that a few people have left comments which makes me feel great. 

After applying online to a bunch of useless and dead end job, I am exhausted and starving once again.  I decide to take a nap in order to not order that pizza I have been daydreaming about.  But then, no joke, I dream about the pizza during the whole nap.

I wake up and try to control these horribly unbearable and torturous hunger pains.  I watch some HGTV, which usually makes me happy but I'm conflicted as I wrestle with the dilemma of what I will eat for the rest of the day.  I'm hurting inside! I feel so lost!

I've decided that if I want to eat something unhealthy that  I might as well do it while the day is still early and just eat something healthier at night.  As a gift to myself, for all my strength and courage in this difficult time, I award myself with homemade macaroni and cheese.  My homemade macaroni and cheese is delicious and fills me with joy and delight.  My method is expert.p  Usually, I take a box of penne, our it in the pot until it's completely full.  When fully cooked, I start adding actual slices of American Cheese.  Deli bought.  Not those shitty Kraft Singles.  Hey, I have some class here.  I use some milk and spray butter (you know, to be on the healthy side).  When it's done, it's a gigantic heaping plateful of fantasticness and deliciousness. In fact, it's inspirational!

But wait!  I'm trying to be good!  Okay, this is what I'll do.  I measure out one cup of whole wheat penne.  I take only two slices of cheese.  I make my pasta feeling disappointed as I stare at that teeny tiny minuscule portion.  My macaroni and cheese looks sad and tiny in it's pasta bowl barely even filled halfway.

OK wait.  I must make a confession.  While I was adding the cheese, I noticed a third lonely slice.  I wrestled with my emotions over this sad little sliver.  I HAD to add him.  It was only fair.  And a sprinkle of Parmesan.  Please don't judge me!

I refrain from the urge to shovel the macaroni in my mouth and try to eat as s l o w l y as I can.  By the time the bowl is empty, believe it or not, I feel full!  I'm in shock!

OK, yeah yeah, I ate unhealthy.  But you can only ask so much of me at a time.  Patience is key my friends.

And I have a nice can of vegetable soup planned for dinner.  BORING.  Find out tomorrow to find out how the rest of my night turned out!

Introduction

My name is Kellie and I am a food-aholic, a true eating machine.  My hobbies include cheese, cake, pizza, cookies, pasta, and more.  Give me macaroni and cheese, chocolate cupcakes with vanilla icing smothering in rainbow sprinkles, penne a la vodka, and I will love you forever.

Buy me a bowl of Panera's broccoli cheddar soup and don't forget to buy the loaf of fresh french bread with.  No, I don't want an apple or chips with my soup.  I'll take the extra bread.

Let's get some mozzarella sticks, bacon covered potato skins, and we'll finish it off with a juicy cheeseburger and fries.  Cheese fries, of course.

Kraft Macaroni and Cheese, you fill me with glee.  Every bite leaves me wanting more.  My sorrow is deep as I eat that very last bite.  But there's always another box.

Mr. Delivery Man, I anxiously await your arrival.  I run to the front door every time I hear a noise.  The moment that doorbell rings, my heart begins to beat with excitement.  I'm in love.  You are beautiful as you stand there with my large pizza with extra cheese that I am planning to consume on my own.  I see you Mr. Delivery Man as you glance in my apartment, looking for the other person I will be sharing my pizza with.  Don't judge me Mr. Delivery Man.  That pizza is for me and me alone.

Is this what my life has come to?  I don't eat to live, I live to eat!  The temptation is all around me on every grocery store shelf, on every street corner.  The lights of the fast food restaurants call to me with promises of delicious delights.  Eating takes away my pain and my boredom.  I try to be good for even a day and I end up baking and eating a dozen cupcakes.  Simply put, I love food.  It makes me happy.

The problem is that the happiness food provides me is only temporary.  Later on, after I've finished my third grilled cheese, I am filled with shame.  I develop terrible stomach aches.  Sweats have become my new fashion statement because I ate my way out of my old wardrobe.  I'm embarrassed when my boyfriend holds me while we lie in bed because I am afraid he will feel my fat rolls.  I can suck in my stomach, but I can't hold my breath 24/7.

So what's the answer?  Perhaps a new hobby or diet?  I doubt my abilities to stick with any of those things.  But I'm ready to try.  Join me in what is sure to be a difficult but hysterical journey in getting my life back.