Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Day 1

Today I began my venture into changing my life and eating habits.  I know it's going to be hard and will possibly even be impossible, but hey, I gotta try.

I was so hungry this morning that I convinced myself I was truly starving.  I ate light last night so I didn't go to bed as full and busting like I usually do.  When I woke up my stomach was growling like a vicious animal.  Oh how I am depriving myself!  I think I feel faint.  I think my body may be failing due to lack of nourishment! I think...that I'm pathetic.  I quickly scarf down a delicious peanut butter and jelly sandwich made on whole wheat (whole wheat!) bread with a deep fervor as if the world is coming to an end and this peanut butter and jelly sandwich is my only hope.  Ooh, much better.  I go online to check email and apply for more jobs.  I'm excited to find that on one of the sites that I post this on, that a few people have left comments which makes me feel great. 

After applying online to a bunch of useless and dead end job, I am exhausted and starving once again.  I decide to take a nap in order to not order that pizza I have been daydreaming about.  But then, no joke, I dream about the pizza during the whole nap.

I wake up and try to control these horribly unbearable and torturous hunger pains.  I watch some HGTV, which usually makes me happy but I'm conflicted as I wrestle with the dilemma of what I will eat for the rest of the day.  I'm hurting inside! I feel so lost!

I've decided that if I want to eat something unhealthy that  I might as well do it while the day is still early and just eat something healthier at night.  As a gift to myself, for all my strength and courage in this difficult time, I award myself with homemade macaroni and cheese.  My homemade macaroni and cheese is delicious and fills me with joy and delight.  My method is expert.p  Usually, I take a box of penne, our it in the pot until it's completely full.  When fully cooked, I start adding actual slices of American Cheese.  Deli bought.  Not those shitty Kraft Singles.  Hey, I have some class here.  I use some milk and spray butter (you know, to be on the healthy side).  When it's done, it's a gigantic heaping plateful of fantasticness and deliciousness. In fact, it's inspirational!

But wait!  I'm trying to be good!  Okay, this is what I'll do.  I measure out one cup of whole wheat penne.  I take only two slices of cheese.  I make my pasta feeling disappointed as I stare at that teeny tiny minuscule portion.  My macaroni and cheese looks sad and tiny in it's pasta bowl barely even filled halfway.

OK wait.  I must make a confession.  While I was adding the cheese, I noticed a third lonely slice.  I wrestled with my emotions over this sad little sliver.  I HAD to add him.  It was only fair.  And a sprinkle of Parmesan.  Please don't judge me!

I refrain from the urge to shovel the macaroni in my mouth and try to eat as s l o w l y as I can.  By the time the bowl is empty, believe it or not, I feel full!  I'm in shock!

OK, yeah yeah, I ate unhealthy.  But you can only ask so much of me at a time.  Patience is key my friends.

And I have a nice can of vegetable soup planned for dinner.  BORING.  Find out tomorrow to find out how the rest of my night turned out!

No comments: